The FIRST and one of the more memorable ones was Miss U-Turd.
Miss U-Turd was coming off the high way on a one way ramp. There were two cars in front of her and one car behind her. I was driving on a two way road going the opposite direction and approaching the ramp to go onto the high way. (The two way road splits into a Y- my side turning into highway and the opposite side merging from highway.) I am about 200 feet from the Y going 55mph (the speed limit- and yes I was following it) and the line of traffic coming off the ramp was probably going about 45mph. Well . . . Miss U-Turd decided that she wanted to be going the same way I was going so she did! She just veered left cutting through the Y and straight in front of me. The line of traffic she came from came to a halt in disbelief. Thankfully, I came to a halt too, but not without sending my purse and all its contents onto the floor of my car. Miss U-Turd stopped in the middle of the road and then backed up into the Y and turned up the ramp heading in the direction I was going. She didn't even look around. She just kept her head forward and did her thing. I was wide eyed and my jaw was most definitely dropped. Traffic started moving again and the man in the car that had been in front of her gave me the most puzzled look and shrugged his shoulders.
That is the story of Miss U-Turd.
The SECOND one was in the same spot except I was coming off the high way on the ramp that heads towards the two-way road. Right before it becomes a two way there is another ramp that comes up on the right. I was about 150 feet from the merge and the car that came up to the ramp and that was supposed to YIELD decided it would go instead. And again . . . purse on the floor. TURD! He even stopped and looked at me coming and decided to jump in front of me anyway. You, turd.
The THIRD one was on the SAME exit ramp!!! GAH! Sean was following me home from the church. We had been cleaning things up a bit for a church event. I was really sick with strep and had a high fever at the time. I was so incredibly tired, because I had just worked all day as well (I wasn't trying to get people sick; I didn't realize at the time that I had strep). I was struggling to stay alert. It was dark, but I don't remember whether or not it was raining. Anyway. We had just exited the high way and were driving on the ramp. I was approaching the curve in the ramp (can't see what's coming because it's in the woods) and I saw lights on the guard rail in front of me . . . lights that were not from me . . . My first thought was "OH MY GOSH I WENT THE WRONG WAY!!!" But then as I approached the curve I realized that I was indeed going the right way, but someone . . . someone was definitely not!
Sure enough a cross-over comes driving around the bend on a one way ramp off a 2-lane high way with dividers (good luck!). The ramp was wide enough that we were all able to pass each other. I believe there was at least one other car behind Sean. No accidents . . . as far as I know.
The FOURTH one happened this morning on my way to work. Okay, so this was not a near accident for me but for the car in front of me . . . oh my goodness. So for a few miles I followed a blue Mitsubishi Lancer through the country on a road the has multiple 90 degree turns. The whole time my jaw was dropped as I watched this car swerve all over God's green earth! Seriously, this lady was nuts. About 70% of the time I followed her she was over the yellow lines in the other lane, opposing traffic or not. Another 10% of the time she was riding the yellow lines. Oh and one time she swerved into the shoulder in time to hit a patch of dirt. I was seriously concerned for opposing traffic. I was just about to call the police and give them her license plate number, but I turned and she went straight.GET OFF THE ROAD, turd.
The FIFTH and hopefully final one for a long time . . . Today I did lots of driving to and from clients. On one special occasion I had just made it through tons of construction and was driving on a very rough road. Thankfully I was going slowly and this incident was safely and easily navigated. I was driving along through a town, and as I approached an intersection this old man in boat drove up to his stop sign. I did not have a stop sign so I had no intention of slowing down . . . well this old man had no intention of looking to see if there were any cars coming. He simply turned left into the my lane to head the same direction I was going. At this point in my long day and after all my experiences with turds as drivers I was like "Oh my goodness, there is no hope. Driving is not safe at all. Proceed with caution. Also old people should have to retest every couple of years . . . "
THE END, turds!
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